Hey Pretty Face!

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For the holiday season, we all want to be happy. And what's a better way to feel jolly than to see a bunch of pretty faces? And all which I personally photographed?

Now, don't take this lightly - I can't be happy when it's 10 below outside! Can you? Apparently, Antarctic Seals couldn't care less. On the contrary - They love some ice on their pretty nose:

Or perhaps they just like to pose for the camera? This penguin, I think, certainly posed for me!

Penguins are extremely cute in general. It is scientifically believed that their cuteness is inversely correlated with their smartness. Watch the following video, where a visibly preoccupied (with its own prettiness) penguin is checking me out in windy and snowy conditions: (Ignore the logo, it's the conversion software I use for free because I'm cheap)

Of course, not all creatures make a happy face all the time! Some, you'll have to admit, may look a bit - well - stupid. I mean, it's not that I have a strong opinion about Alaskan Mountain Goats, but put a leaf in her mouth and let her pose... You know what I mean?

Not to mention the angry Bison! How do I know it's angry? Enlarge the photo and have a look at his eye! Well, maybe it's just got an attitude.

And finally, the Pretty Face Competition! Today, we're presenting two finalists. Both are at the top of their own food chain. Both are at the Arctic. And both have gladly posed for this important contest. Meet Tim, a fellow traveler, and Am I Pretty Or What?, whom I encountered on a recent trip. Cast your votes!

To see more closeups, read my post Eye to Eye 

Give Me Love! (Or at least a bear hug)

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Is everybody looking for love? Some people, when seeing the picture above, think the bear was just curious; others think it was hungry. I say - When you're out and freezing, about to walk on sea ice for six months on your own - You're looking for love. Or at least a bear hug.

What's a bear hug anyway?

That depends on whom you're asking. A language observer, probably a woman, defines it as "a strong, hearty embrace, typically between two men;" a Wall Street hotshot defines it as "an unsolicited takeover bid which is so generous that the target is unlikely to refuse;" a collegiate sports fanatic: "a grappling clinch hold... the hands are locked around the opponent and the opponent is held tightly to the chest." Hmm... And the Geek Version? "a literal bear hug is an undesirable phenomenon in which a bear, able to stand upright, claws rapidly with a hugging position."

Duh.

All the above definitions are taken from Wikipedia , which I guess is reliable because so many people contribute to it, although some say it's too liberal at letting definitions in.

One thing for sure - that little bear up there really wants an affectionate hug, and it shows it!

Bears certainly hug for a variety of purposes. What may look like a fight to the naked eye can be a game of affection for a couple of healthy, bored Polar bears. In the following photo, one could think "isn't that bear forcing itself on the other one, kind of a rough kiss?"

Would sure look like that if these were college bears! But a minute later, the other bear seems to show affection:

And the one on the left seems what - Shy? Just click to enlarge and judge for yourself! Hard to say that about a predator at the top of the food chain, but that's what it looks to me!

In truth, this is all probably a practice in fighting, and some exercise to get those old muscles going. Sometimes, it's training of a young cub by a loving mother-bear. Here, she's challenging him to mimic a fight, but shows him there's a limit to his excitement:

"You just stay there and don't get any closer, son!"

A bear hug can also take the form of a dance, where two giant, 800 pound (200 kilo) predators are measuring each other.

"I guess we'll just stay friends. Give my five!"

Read my post Yogi Polar Bear to see more funny pictures of the giants of the Arctic!

Who Don't Care 'bout The Polar Bear?

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It helps to have thick skin. (No, you have not been redirected to one of my self-help sites where I collect Google Ads dollars! You're still at arcticfever.com)

As you may have read in previous posts, summers in the Arctic are no longer fun for the Polar bear. Sometimes, before they can say "Jack Robinson", (or "Jack Daniel's" if you believe the stories about drinking habits in the far north) a Polar bear waking up from winter on Svalbard Island cannot see any sea ice, because it has melted and retreated so far, and so fast, that it's hundreds of miles away.

This means no ice floats to hunt for seal, and that means a long summer without food. Well, you'd say, pity for all living animals on the island! The Polar bear is at the top of its own food chain, a well trained killing machine, and so any sea mammal on the island is doomed!

Not as far as the Walrus is concerned. The Walrus, which weighs up to a ton, can dive down to 800 feet to scrap clams of the bottom of the Arctic Ocean, and has two very sharp tasks, also has very thick skin. 

As the sea ice melts, Walruses come on shore by the hundreds, mighty yet lazy. Easy prey? Not really. Their skin is so thick, and their demeanor so violent, that they're not really threatened. Following are photos of a Polar bear trapped on Svalbard for the summer, very hungry. It walked along the shore looking for food, and look who it saw! (Pics were shot from my kayak)

   

The smell of fresh meat might drive him crazy, so he decides to check it out:

Are you afraid of Polar Bears? Not the Walrus! See how they don't even bother to look up. They know the bear will not hurt them because they can hurt it. Right now, he's looking for a young or sick one, which they may have among them.

The Walrus couldn't be bothered. After all, if you looked like this, would you?

And the bear? It doesn't know whether it should be frustrated or just not waste energy. It's hungry, almost starving, but knows a fight with a bunch of healthy Walruses will not fix that.

So it just walks past them. Look at the Walruses - I would be Offended by not being looked at like they're treating the Polar bear! So what's left? The bear, frustrated, tired, hungry, and lonely, despite being one of the most efficient predators on the face of the earth, has one option left:

Will it survive the summer? An increasing number of Polar bears starve to death as they're trapped on Arctic islands, the summer ice floating hundreds of miles away. Global Warming, man-made or not, is taking its toll.

And finally, another piece of self-help advice: if you see a Walrus like in the following photo, make sure you stay stable on your kayak no matter what.

To read more about the Walrus, see my post The Beauty And The Beast

A Free Advice for Amazon

Have you read the news over the weekend? A vicious thunderstorm in Virginia, USA, cut the power to millions of houses and - most importantly - to an Amazon data center. As a result, many services hosted on Amazon where shut down for hours, most notably Instagram.

The Instagram incident was very painful, because millions of young kids were forced to upload to Facebook pictures that looked modern, not 30-years old!!! And in real natural colors!! It ruined the weekend for all of them. 

But Amazon can only blame itself. Who puts a data center in Virginia? The state gets thunderstorms half the time, and you can't even fly technicians in because the airports are closed. And on top of that they have to put fences and fancy stuff to protect the data center from crooks trying to break in and steal their books. Well, I guess the books are electronic. Whatever.

But, Voila, I have a suggestion for them: Just move your data center to Svalbard . Svalbard is an island north of Norway, up into the Arctic Sea. It's cold, isolated, and remote. In fact, as you can read in the link above, Svalbard hosts the Global Seed Vault, a safe-in-a-cave dug deep into the mountain, where seeds of plants, fruits, and vegetables from many countries are stored in case a global disaster breaks. Till then, the seeds are stored in a naturally frozen vault, at a place where no Iranian lunatic will bother to drop The Bomb.

The seeds include those of over 1,500 types of potatoes! We're all going to have one big mashed potato party after the next nuclear war.

 Svalbard is a beautiful place to tour, especially by kayaking along its shores: (click on any photo to enlarge it)

The island is the last front before you paddle the Arctic Sea all the way up to the pole, or rather to the permanent ice cap. But in recent years, the effects of global warming have been felt even there, with very little ice on the water during the summer.

I love this picture! Look at the ice! But back to our topic. Amazon will get lots of benefits from placing its data center in Svalbard, next to the Seed Vault. There are no thunderstorms. But most importantly, there is no need for all these security budgets because there are free guards all over the place! As a proof, here are some incidents of thieves trying to get into the Seed Vault that I caught on my camera:

1. A thief trying to sneak into the Vault:

 - And a guard popping up and saying "not so fast, pal!" (yes, it's a Walrus)

2. Another thief trying to get onto the shore while a guard (accompanied by her kids as school's out for summer) says "yeah, right, why don't you just come on shore?"

3. Skeletons of Seed Seekers who died attempting to get on the island while pretending to be whales:

And, if all hell breaks loose and someone passes all the perimeter security, there's always Martin waiting for them.

In short, I can't seem to understand why not transfer the data center to Svalbard. After all - Aren't bits more important than seeds?

Get some summer reading done by reading my post Alaska, Arctic, and Far North Books to Read

Sheer Bear Power

Nice, ha? You're on a road in a well regarded national park, and apparently the right of way does not belong to you! I mean, it might belong to you, but would you exercise it?

Bears are mighty, powerful, and massive animals, even when they look small and sort of cute or innocent. While most don't eat meat and if they do - you're in danger only if you're a fish, you don't want to get under their paws or between their jaws.

How's that for a rule of thumb?

Today, I present a collection of some powerful photos of bears, photos I took from generally short distances but without really risking my life too much. I will say little, so you just sit back and contemplate the strength of the animals in these pictures. Click on any picture to enlarge it!

So, bears like fish and they like berries. (during season, a lone bear can consume over an acre's worth of berries per day) But you don't always need a closeup photo to get a feel for their sheer power. Here's one of my favorite pictures, taken in Denali Park, Alaska; from a fair distance, I could almost feel the muscle mass of this lone, survival machine:

But of-course, sometimes bears will be glad to demonstrate their strength to their pals, in a game that makes you wonder how they survive it.

You don't want to get under the claws of these guys! Once, preparing for a hike at Yellowstone, I saw a car whose passenger side door was completely ripped and thrown beside it on the ground. The reason? A couple of hikers left some food in the trunk. A Grizzly bear smelled it, and first tried to open the trunk. I guess he didn't have the keys! So he ripped out the passenger side door, got in, tore apart the back seat of the car, got into the trunk, took the food and went back home. Call that a day's work when you get back to your family!

BUT - They are cute sometimes, especially when young and innocent:

And they do climb trees as babies.

Read more about bears in my post The Brown Bears of Katmai

A Polar Bear Walks Into A Bar

A polar bear walks into a bar. The bartender says: "Hey, you're not allowed in here!" The bear looks around and says "Well, then kick me out, will you?" The bartender considers this for a moment and says: "No, but I'm gonna call the Polar bear police, and they will throw you into the Polar bear prison!"

Churchill, on the Hudson Bay, is a town of about 850 residents, with close to 1,300 polar bears roaming the area around it from June to late November. Polar bears are intelligent animals and know that the nightlife in town is much better than out there in the woods, especially when autumn comes and the bears begin to get excited towards their return to the frozen ocean. What a better way to wait in great anticipation than to walk into a bar in Churchill?

The Polar Bear Alert Program is in fact the main police force in Churchill. At a town where the access to and from is only by train or aircraft, you don't need too many cops. They just swing by the train station once a day before the departure, then off to the airport, and pick up all the thieves trying to escape town, and that's it!

But bears are different, and they can get into town and roam the street at any time. When this happens, the Polar Bear Alert staff quickly gets there. First, they try to scare the bear off to leave town. If this does not work, they shoot some arrows into the bear's skin, and haul it up to the Polar Bear Holding Facility. (click on any photo to enlarge)

The holding facility is like a prison. The bears sit in cages, bang on the walls and demand all sorts of things. But at least the government does not need to feed them, since the bears do not eat anything during the summer - They only feed on seal once they get on the sea-ice during winter. The holding facility contains five cells.

Usually, when winter is around the corner and the sea-ice begins to form, the bears are transported by truck (tranquilized, of course) onto the shore, where they are released and get on the ice for the winter. However, in a typical summer more Polar bears are captured than there are cells, and so they are transported further north of the city to be released in the woods and spend there the remainder of the hot season.

First, the tranquilized bears are brought outside surrounded by "armed guards":

 

Hey - A double package today!!!:

Then, the staff wraps them with a large net:

Look, ma, airmail delivery today!!!:

The helicopter which will transport the bears to the remote territory where their destined to stay till the winter is there, and the Polar Bear Alert staff are tying the net to it. Then - Liftoff!:

The chopper flies away. Once it lands, the bear will be released. The guard stays there until the bear wakes up, makes sure it is healthy and well, and then calls the aircraft to take it back home. End of story! Boy do they look like two big pieces of meat, don't they?

 

Read my post Yogi Polar Bear

Sumo Wrestling In The Arctic

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Ever seen two teenage boys filled with adrenaline (not to mention other hormones), bored at the schoolyard? Looking for a reason to rough it up, scuffling, then being friends again?

The days in Hudson Bay before the ocean freezes up but when the signs for it are all around, is a very special time for the Polar bears of Churchill. They have survived close to five months without food, the males mated (or fantasized about that) with the females, and now, as the freshwater ponds and springs freeze, they know their time to dine again is just around the corner.

Bears in general are solitary animals. Whenever we see a bunch of bears together it's either because there is a lot of food in one area which they need to share, or because they prepare to get on the sea-ice in one particular place. So when they do get together, it's a great opportunity to bring their adrenaline levels even higher, show who's stronger, and spend time.

The younger males like to fight. That's a much better way to stretch their muscles than do Yoga like the older bears! But keep in mind - a healthy male, even after five months of fasting, may weigh over 1,300 pounds (625kg), and when they stand up, can tower as high as 10-12 feet (3-4m)!

Then, they charge at each other:

Make no mistake: this is neither ballet nor slow dancing. Not even American football. This interaction is forceful, powerful, and aggressive.  Yet, at the same time it is gentle in the sense that they do not really mean to kill each other. watch this bear's tooth near the other one's mouth - Can you imagine being seriously bitten by it? (click to enlarge)

Sometimes, even the naked eye can see who's dominating the fake fight - just looking them in the eyes:

 

"But, so long that we're fighting, we should try some Sumo wrestling!" Yes, the Polar bears know not only how to take advantage of their height, but also of their sheer mass and strength, and so on occasion one sees what can only be called Sumo Wrestling in The Arctic. In the two pictures below, notice the "dynamics of the fight" - Can you tell who's winning?

However, in the end all the Polar bears care about at that point is the upcoming seal hunting season, so they end the game with  a friendly, yet "let's be sure who's stronger here" Give Me Five

  

Read about The Brown Bears of Katmai in my previous post